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omsie_x Yahoo User
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Posted: Sun Nov 25, 2007 1:35 pm Post subject: will it get any easier? (recovery)? |
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| i'm trying to recover from anorexia. i thought i would get better and that things would be easier but it's harder. i lost a lot during my eating disorder (friends, boyfriends, looks, personality, confidence, grades dropped). since i've started recovery nothing has changed, it's actually harder. i used to feel lonely and isolated, and everyday life was more of a struggle simply because i was starving, but i was losing weight, so it felt ok, it was worth it, because each day i was existing i was closer to perfection. now it's the opposite, i still have these anorexic thoughts in my head screaming at me 24/7. i am at a slightly healthier weight as i am eating (98lbs at 5'6) but i feel the same. everytime i gain i feel like dying, my body looks ridiculous because every pound i've gained has gone on to my middle.i hate eating, i just want to fast, it's not even about weight loss anymore. i can feel flesh between my ribs and skin and it's horriblei just want my old happy carefree life back. but i feel i will never be the person i was again. will things get any better? is there any hope for me because right now i just want to go and die in a hole |
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julianna d Yahoo User
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Natalie Yahoo User
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Posted: Sun Nov 25, 2007 1:43 pm Post subject: |
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| I feel the exact same way. I am recovering too. I am gaining weight too and I hate the feeling - I feel out of control. Right now I'm 89.5 and my lowest was 81. I'm getting 1,200 calories a day but I'll keep gaining until I'm a weight where 1,200 calories provides however many calories I need a day. I don't want to be the same and chunky like I used to be. I'm scared. |
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fun~loving~girl~ Yahoo User
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Posted: Sun Nov 25, 2007 1:49 pm Post subject: |
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| Someone once told me that it takes four times as long to get over something as the time you went through it. Like, say you had a boyfriend for 2 months, and you broke up. It would then take 8 months to get over him (but that also can be changed by the strenth of feelings you had for him). The answer is yes. You will get better. You just have to think of all the good things you have right now. LIFE for one thing, your caring parents, a home. It's going to be hard recovering, but as time goes on it'll get easier. One day you'll wake up and not feel as sharp of a pain as you have been. One day you'll wake up and realize you've gotten used to the feel of flesh on your ribs. One day, you'll wak up and realize you're recovered. But then you have to figure out that once anorexia has taken place, and after it's been recovered, your pre-anorexia days are gone forever. There's no getting them back. You can make new friends, meet the guy of your dreams. But you'll still cary the scars of your past, anorexic nightmares will come back to haunt you, and some people still won't trust you like they did back then. There will be days you won't want to eat, and days you don't really mind it. Anorexia truly does ruin people's lives. But those people can fight back. You're one of those people, and as long as you've been strong enough to fight back, you'll be strong enough to win... |
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Cold Bird Yahoo User
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Posted: Sun Nov 25, 2007 1:50 pm Post subject: |
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| Are you going through any form of therapy along with just eating more? Sounds like yous till have a lot of work to do with your body and self image and you can't do it alone. You really need to talk to your doctor about this or whoever is in charge of your rehabilitation. Also if possible tey to get referred to bot a occupational and physiotherapist specialized in eating disorders as well as a nutritionist. You should be gaining muscle instead of just gaining weight as well. Please see someone to talk about this!And yes eventually it will be better and easier, but you still need help and hard work! Good luck with it hun! |
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translatorinspain Yahoo User
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Posted: Sun Nov 25, 2007 1:51 pm Post subject: |
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| Firstly congratulations on conquering your anorexia, that's something to be proud of. The people you lost during your illness were not serious friends or they would have been there for you. Your looks will come back with your weight. I'm assuming you're in the US are there any groups there that can help you? You don't say how old you are but can you try to help others in a similar situation? You need to do something constuctive with your illness and often when you see others who are not recovering you see things differently. Please try and get help, you've done the hard part, I can tell you it's normal to feel flesh between your ribs and skin but you won't believe me, YOU need to believe it. You know you are still underweight and most men will tell you they like women with boobs, a tummy and a bum! We don't believe them because it's not what we see in magazines, but it's true. You've done the worst bit, now go forward with your head held high and conquer the world, it's your oyster. |
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Dr Wot Yahoo User
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Posted: Sun Nov 25, 2007 2:20 pm Post subject: |
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| As you get back to a 'normal' weight, you might find it helpful to take up exercises that need (and build) hard, dense muscle.This kind of 'flesh' feels very different from softer tissues, and the exercises that build it, will streamline your figure instead of 'going to your middle'.The 'right' kind of exercises are Boxing, Judo, Powerlifting, Gymnastics (particularly Vaulting), and of course Bodybuilding. Many other exercises & sports also contain the same kind of 'explosive' work, which will strengthen and consolidate muscle tissue.If you are being helped by Dieticians, talk to them about this. If Physiotherapists or Remedial Exercise Instructors are available, then they will be able to give you some pointers. For example, you might need to start very gently and gradually, if the eating disorder has caused damage to your skeletal or nerve systems.If you are being treated by Doctors or Psychologists, they may not understand that there is a difference between the 'endurance' exercises (light, repetitive, long duration) that a lot of anorexic people like to do, and 'power' exercises (heavy, short duration, quickly producing fatigue) that will build muscle and help you to feel strong and capable. If your doctor or psychiatrist is reluctant to allow you to exercise (because they think you will use it to control your weight), then being referred to a physiotherapist might help. The Physio can monitor your progress, and reassure the doctor that you are doing the right kind of exercise, and gaining appropriate weight as you progress.Using power exercises to increase your musculature, will also help you to eat more, because of the extra 'demand' for fuel. Having a reason (to help harden and build your muscles) for eating will make it easier to 'like' putting food in your mouth. After a while, you will be able to enjoy fuelling your energetic activities, and think about your stronger, more capable body as 'more perfect' than the skinny one was. |
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Eckybun Yahoo User
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Posted: Wed Nov 28, 2007 6:11 am Post subject: |
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| I think you are amazing. You are a strong person and you are going to beat this. When you have put on another 20 pounds your body should start to even out. It is going to take a while for your body to recover from anorexia, and even longer for you to recover mentally, but I believe that you will learn to cope. I suffer from body dismorphia, but I am now in control. |
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